Evening, infidels!

Friday's Daily Mail (UK) had a great opinion piece by Richard Littlejohn. In it, he discusses the BBC's plans to launch two new channels; one an Arabic news channel to compete with al Jazeera and the other in Farsi to be beamed into Iran. Mr. Littlejohn wryly asks:

Wouldn't it be cheaper just to put out the BBC's domestic service on satellite? No one would notice the difference.

Indeed. The BBC is so pro-Arab, pro-Muslim and anti-Western as to be indistinguishable from al Quaeda's PR firm. Here's an amusing snip from his column on Littlejohn's mental image of al-BBC:

(Roll titles)

Good evening, infidel dogs. I spit on you. The mujahideen are coming to murder you in your beds and the blood of your kafur children and your drunken whores will run through the streets of your decadent, godless cities. That's our top story tonight - and, of course, every other night.

Some breaking news this evening - a plane has crashed into a skyscraper in New York. Unfortunately, only two people were killed.

We also celebrate the fourth anniversary of the glorious Bali martyrdom operation, a shining day in history for all true believers.

In an exclusive interview from Lebanon, the president of Iran tells our diplomatic editor, Sheikh Omar Bakri, of his plans to wipe the pariah, pigs-and-monkeys state of Izza-ray-el off the map in a nuclear holocaust, just as soon as he receives the plutonium from North Korea.

Our crime correspondent, Abu Izzadeen, reports on the progress in the fatwa against the Danish cartoonists who insulted Islam.

Later in the programme, in our consumer affairs slot, I'll be presenting a special report from West London on how you can become a property tycoon while living on benefits - and, indeed, while in prison.

Our legal aid correspondent, Anjem Choudary, will be bringing you an update on the imposition of Sharia law in East Ham.

There'll be the latest news on the campaign to have London Underground stations renamed after the four members of the July 7 martyrdom brigade.

We've got exclusive footage from our brothers in Iraq showing a Western aid worker slut having her head sawn off. If you can't wait for that, it is available right now on our website, where you'll also find easyto-follow instructions on making Ricin in your own kitchen.

Sir Ian Blair apologises to all Muslims for something which hasn't actually happened yet.

In sport, we ask if England goalkeeper Paul Robinson should have his right leg amputated to punish him for letting in that soft own goal in Croatia.

And coming up after the break, a shocking report from the Great Satan on how, in their latest outrage against Islam, the rapacious, infidel running dogs of the illegitimate and immoral Bush regime have, er, banned online gambling.