Boost your self esteem

Pledging allegiance is for wimps...worship that thang!

It's a bitch being an American these days. The Europeans hate us, the Russians hate us (again), Latin America hates us, the Muslim world really hates us...it's all hate, all the time for us.

So if all that hate is grinding you down, head to the island of Tanna in the island nation of Vanuatu off the eastern coast of Australia. It seems they have a cargo cult there that worships -- are you ready for this? -- America. But you may want to bring some durable goods with you.

Village elders tell of how a mysterious outsider came to their forbears in a series of apparitions, telling them to go back to their traditional ways. The idea of a messiah-like outsider was given a huge boost during the Second World War, when hundreds of Tannese men were recruited by the Americans to build roads, airstrips and bases. They were impressed by the large amounts of cargo – tanks, weapons, medicine and food – brought by the US military. The shadowy spirit figure they already believed in gradually assumed a name and a nationality – Jon Frum is believed to be a contraction of John From America, a reference perhaps to a soldier who showed particular generosity.

There's probably a great comedy movie in the making here, but I somehow don't see Hollywood rushing to make a movie that has anything to do with America worship.